audit’s thoughts.

Can we go back to 2006

April 12th, 2007 | by audit |

As most of the the readers know that visit this page on a daily basis, 2007 hasn’t been kind to neither myself or my family. It seems like each month that starts, something worse comes along and it’s not getting any better. The crap I’m going through now with my wife’s disability and some other issues that I’m unable to write about has almost broken me.

Starting this Saturday, I’m going to start seeing a pdoc to try to help me through some of these issues. As I’ve mentioned before, it’s not right to take my issues out on my wife and kids after work or even things that happen outside of work. This past weekend we rented The Pursuit of Happyness and I’m not ashamed to say that it brought a tear to my eye a few times while watching this movie. As a father, I understand EVERYTHING that Will Smith’s character went through in this movie as I feel like I go through it all the time. As a father, all I ever want to do is give my kids the best that I can provide for them and since I work in IT and with Michigan being a at-will state, which means that a company can fire you for sneezing if they feel like it, it just adds more pressure to me. This is where I hope that the pdoc will come in on helping me deal with these issues. My regular doc put me on xanax to help me with the stress that I’m under day in and day out. I even quit turning on the computer when I get home anymore and setup some filters on my Blackberry where only work e-mails come in during the night. I check my personal e-mail during the day 3 times a day, when I arrive in the office, during lunch and once before I leave for the day.

With all this that’s been said, I’m also going to be making a few other changes in my life to try to make me a better father and husband. I don’t believe in divorce or even separation, my kids and wife need me more then ever and I’m going to do whatever I can to be the best father and husband that I can possibly be.